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Location: Educational Program Day 26
Discussion: How do you tell people, i.e. family, friends, co-workers, about TMS?
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ForestForTreesTMS |
How do you tell people, i.e. family, friends, co-workers, about TMS?
Feb 17 2011, 4:51 PM EST
During the process of creating the educational program I asked several fellow peers How do they tell people, i.e. family, friends, co-workers about TMS/PPD? These are there responses:MatthewNJ: "I just explain it as Dr. Clarke does, Stress induced , and as soon as they roll their eyes, give up on it and don't take it personally. only 10-15% of folks are open to it to begin with. In my mind it does't really matter if my family buys into it. I would like them too, but it is more important that I do, and I move down my path of recovery." marshacohen: "I would not discuss TMS with anyone unless I had some idea they would be able to accept the idea of TMs. Most people , at least those I have spoke to about TMS are not very receptive to the idea and therefore are not very supportive . Sometimes their attitudes can be damaging to recovery." 2Scoops: “I just tell them that our bodies are reacting to fear, stress and tension. Over time the chemistry of our bodies change from thoughts, stress and then we have symptoms. I try to keep it simple." Penny4Them: "I told few people. In the beginning I wanted to tell people my latest diagnosis, for sympathy perhaps, but more so I realized that I wanted to see in others that they believed in TMS before I would. I was trying to convince MYSELF of TMS theory and not them. To this day (4 years after my physical revelation), my family and even my husband do not understand, but I understand they are not the ones who need to understand TMS, it's me who needs to understand. The most important person you need to tell is YOU! If you feel compellled to tell folks, I'd investigate what you expect to get out of sharing this. TMS is your personal problem." If anyone else has any thoughts I would love to hear from you. 1 out of 1 found this valuable. Do you?
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Back2-It |
1. RE: How do you tell people, i.e. family, friends, co-workers, about TMS?
Feb 18 2011, 8:50 AM EST
For those willing to listen I explain how TMS differs from the psychotherapy community's definition of psychosomatic pain. Some actually process it, but most don't. For those who don't accept or "get" what I am saying I get lumped into the "crazy" department. Usually those who listen are either afflicted with some strange malady themselves or have family members who are. This because they or their loved ones have been told that what they have has no organic cause and that it is "in their heads". My quickest and most understandable explanation is that your brain can restrict the flow of blood to muscles and nerves, just like a charleyhorse. As Penny stated, the most important person to understand it is me. I was in such sad shape several months ago that I missed entirely Dr. Sarno's saying that the physical action triggers the pain and not the other way around. Once I got that I still struggle with the structural "evidence" I have from an MRI. I think the human race will have to evolve a few more notches before TMS becomes a commonly recognized problem and treated correctly. Do you find this valuable? |
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E-marlene |
2. RE: How do you tell people, i.e. family, friends, co-workers, about TMS?
Feb 18 2011, 10:06 AM EST
That's a very good question.I try to avoid discussing my recovery with people with whom I am not very close. I just tell them that I got better, if they insist on details I say that it was probably due to stress. As for as my close friends and family, I try to explain them Dr Sarno's findings by using some parallels with different illnesses. I usually tell them first about stomach ulcers, high blood pressure or irritable bowel syndrome - how these ailments are physical yet very often are brought about by stress or other negative emotions. Then I tell them how the vegetative nervous system can cut off oxygen supply in muscles and thus create pain, and how the process can be reversed. I caught myself on stressing the physiological part of the whole story - as I fear a bit that they will think it's "all in my head". I think that it works. Do you find this valuable? |
marjrc |
3. RE: How do you tell people, i.e. family, friends, co-workers, about TMS?
Feb 18 2011, 11:23 AM EST
When I was first convinced that TMS was THE reason for almost all my pain, I could see many instances with friends and family members that it was also the answer to their issues. I wanted to shout from the rooftops that it's TMS and can be 'fixed'! Since I was, and am still, quite the beginner, I am glad I refrained from shouting that I had the answer to all of humanity's chronic pain conditions. LOL That is a psychological issue I am working on, actually, so.... ;) I do tell people, that I don't actually have Fibro or chronic this or that anymore, but that in MY case, it's due to real tension caused by internal stress and that I am addressing those issues instead of "fixing" anything physical. I tell them that I know there is nothing structurally wrong with me, so there's no point in dwelling on that much and that my attention is on healing from within. Depending on who I speak to, I go into detail or I don't. Most people's eyes glaze over so I keep things brief. THAT is a new one for me too, so yet another lesson that I'm learning! :) Do you find this valuable? |
MorComm |
4. RE: How do you tell people, i.e. family, friends, co-workers, about TMS?
Jan 16 2012, 3:46 PM EST
I thought I'd play devil's advocate and take on all comers on a Rock Climber's blog site entitled SuperTopo where there was a string called "L5-S1 Disk Rupture, Oophs!" You can bet there were many, many individuals there complaining about lower-lumbar pain and giving their case histories. Some even provided gory MRIs and back diagrams to show what was physically wrong with them. Climbers as a group are all extremely perfectionist, want approval from the group for their accomplishments, and are extremely touchy about their 'image' (suggesting to me that they typically suffer from low-self esteem). Well, when I suggested that most of them were suffering from a pain condition induced by self-induced stress due to personality characteristics and perhaps emotional trauma too, boy did I get an ear-full! However, some of the case histories were so clearly TMS that some of my detractors started to think twice. Even though they would admit the possibility was there, they couldn't accept that there wasn't a physical reason for their pain. After all, some of them had been going to a chiro three or four times a year for an "adjustment" for 20 years. One case in particular struck me as obviously TMS: A guy with the handle DMK mentioned how he had "hurt" himself mowing hay and stacking it 18 years ago and now every time he performed similar motions with his body experienced excruciating lower back and leg pain. I suggested that perhaps he had associated those motions with pain he was having at that particular time that he was mowing the grass and now each time he performed similar physical motions that the pain mysteriously came back. I told him that the pain probably had nothing to do with his back. DMK gradually came around to admitting the possibility that I might be right, but still clung to the physical diagnosis that was obviously reinforced by his periodic trips to the chiro.
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